I would like every fat person to get themselves a “fattitude”.
A fattitude that tells the world, “Don’t even start with me …”
I don’t mean you have to strike fear in the heart of everyone you meet. Fattitude doesn’t have to do that (although it is an option). Be nice, be friendly, just make it clear that you are not going to put up with any crap.
At the base of fattitude, I think, is not letting other people have power over you. Know that you can walk away from hurtful people and situations. It’s your choice who you let into your life and what you put up.
Something else that helps me is I understand that I am not perfect and neither is anybody else. I don’t like everybody — for any number of reasons. So I accept that not everyone is going to like me — for any number of reasons (not just because I’m fat). I gossip (I know, not nice, but come on) about people, so I accept that other people may gossip about me.
I think my fattitude is why I have not faced as much fat-hatred, bias, etc. that so many others have. I tell people, with a smile, “Don’t make me hurt you.” But as my husband puts it, I’m “kidding on the square”. There is a touch of truth in my statement and people who don’t know me (and even some who do) aren’t sure just how much truth and how much joke is there and treat me accordingly.
It is up to me to set my personal boundaries and it is up to me to maintain those boundaries.
I try to keep an open mind and give everyone a chance. To not assume someone is going to be a fat hater or that problems with people do not necessarily arise from me being fat. I try to educate those who say stupid fatphobic things. I try to educate the fat talkers and diet talkers I come in contact with. And if that fails, then I don’t need that person in my life. Period. Life hands me enough stress without me inviting more in.
So empower yourself and give yourself permission to take care of yourself and get yourself some fattitude!