A few months ago I asked some hypothetical questions about being complimented by a stranger. (And thanks again for the responses.) Today I have another bunch of them, sort of in the same vein, but this time not about a face-to-face encounter with the real but about a virtual encounter with your image. Here goes:
Say you post a picture of yourself online. How would you feel about each of the following if it occurs:
1. Someone compliments you on your beauty.
2. Someone says you are unattractive.
3. Someone says your are sexy.
4. Someone copies/reblogs your photo.
5. Your photo appears on a porn site (even though there’s nothing pornographic about the photo).
I’d love to hear your responses.
Fatties United! 
1. I would say thank you.
2. I would say their mom seems to like me okay.
3. It would really depend on the context. If it’s a friend, and we talk to each other like that, I’d say thank you. Same if it were a pic that was supposed to be sexy. Otherwise… I’d be uncomfortable, but ignore the comment unless it got more explicit.
4. Again, depends on context. I’d be pretty jazzed if they gave credit. If they didn’t, and it was just a tumblr of pretty pics or something, I’d be a little bit flattered. If they posted it as an example of an ugly jerk, I’d email them telling them to take it down.
5. I think I would find this hilarious. I mean, it’s a violation, but it’s such a strange and blatant violation that I’d probably show up in the comments on that site offering to answer questions or link to it from my Facebook page or something. I mean, it’s not really any worse for people to jack off to pictures of me on a porn site than to jack off to the same pictures wherever I originally posted them.
Thanks, Gene!
1. I’d say thanks and compliment the person back
2. I’m used to it and won’t try to defend myself. But will usually answer with: ” F-U and get a life, sad piece of sh**. If you feel so small that you need to bash other people on their appearance, that’s YOUR problem not mine. Now F**k off.”
3. *blushes* I don’t say thanks or anything because I don’t know how to react
4. Dependingly on the context I will ask the person to remove it since I did not gave my permission.
5. Would declare to the police and try to take legal action.
Thanks, Minie!
1. Depending on context, I would either be flattered or I would wonder what the scam was.
2. It would bother me initially, but I would get over it pretty quickly
3. I would feel validated initially, but that would be short-lived, too
4. Depends where they put it, but likely I would not be happy if it was without my permission. If it was to disparage me, I would be angry.
5. I would probably send them a cease and desist email (ask them, accompanied by legalese, to take it down)
Thanks, Emily!
1. Why thanks! 🙂 You made my day.
2. Meh, to each their own. I’m not here to please anyone.
3. ^__^ Thanks!
4. I’d ask for them to acknowlege me or take the pic down.
5. Demand they take my pic down and report them to the police if they don’t.
Thanks, Jen!
Just went through my FB pages looking for examples:
1. Someone compliments you on your beauty – “Awww, thanks! That picture doesn’t show the rip in my dress/ zit on my chin/ scuff on my shoe/ etc.”
2. Someone says you are unattractive. – No response from me. Cry while my friends post things like “Nuh-uh, she’s adorbs!”
3. Someone says your are sexy. – “Thanks!” (cringing inside)
4. Someone copies/reblogs your photo. – Hasn’t happened yet. Would probably not do anything about it.
5. Your photo appears on a porn site (even though there’s nothing pornographic about the photo). – Same as above. Would be too horrified to pull myself together enough to do anything. 😦
Thanks, 32-P!
I think for most of these I’d give a simple “thanks” and walk away from it, ya know? When I post my pics online, I’m not looking for compliments or opinions (unless I’m asking directly). As for reblogs? No worries. Porn site? Hmmm…I might ask for payment or something, but I doubt I would be terribly offended or anything. As long as the pic isn’t used as a certain “people of…” site is, then I would be fine.
Thanks, Notblue!
1. I’d say thank you
2. I’d say “F_ off” (assuming, you know, I didn’t ask “what do you think of how I look?”) and depending on what context it was I’d ban them/disable further comments from them.
3. Again, I’d thank them.
4. It would depend on the context
5. I’d email them and ask them to take it down. Even if the photo was non sexual if it’s on a porn site there’s the implication I’m somehow involved!
Thanks, Lindsay!
1. Someone compliments you on your beauty.
Feel: they are pulling my leg
Do: thank them,
2. Someone says you are unattractive.
Feel: Yeah, whatver. Miffed.
Do: nothing. If an answer is called for, keep it neutral.
3. Someone says your are sexy.
Feel: surprised
Do: depends on whether they are creepy or not, Thank them or ignore.
4. Someone copies/reblogs your photo.
Feel: even more surprised
Do: Depends on context. Wide variety of possible reactions.
5. Your photo appears on a porn site (even though there’s nothing pornographic about the photo).
Feel: Confused, a little embarrased, WTFBBQ?
Do: Ask them to take it down.
In all of those cases, a strong component to my feeling would be surprise or utter bafflement at being noticed at all. In real life, I can stand alone in in front of a deli counter for two minutes before the employee behind it notices that someone is there.
Thanks, Inge!
1: I’d say thank you-but be wary as if it’s coming from an online stranger it’s usually leading to something else, if ya know what I mean
2. I’d probably be initially a bit hurt but that would last a nanosecond before my sensible/logical side took over and realised this person means nothing to me.
3: I’d be wary and sidestep the comment. Or make the statement that one cannot tell by a mere photograph-but that would invariably lead to further conversation regarding my sexiness and that’s getting kind of icky.
4: An odd thing to do really. But the internet is a weird neighborhood. If it’s a pic of my cute cats then I’d understand.
5: What kind of porn site would want a picture of a size 16 who often forgets to shave her armpits and suffers from serious T zone shine issues?
Oh yeah, the internet’s a weird neighborhood alright.
Thanks, Bexkee!
Here are my personal responses:
1. I like compliments, and I’d say thanks.
2. I wouldn’t respond, and would probably delete the comment or e-mail.
3. Same as with 1.
4. I probably wouldn’t know about it, but wouldn’t necessarily have a problem with it.
5. I’d probably demand that they take it down, unless I wanted to support the site for some reason.
Thanks again to all those who’ve answered so far. And if you haven’t, feel free to do so, Gentle Readers. There are no wrong answers!
1. Ah? Really? o_o Thanks!
2. Didn’t post it to make your pants tight, buddy! STFU!
3. Aah, gee, you sure about that…?
4. Cool! I’m gonna come by and comment on where you reblogged it!
5. OMFG. WUT? O_____O But I’m NOT EVEN NAKED! What are you GETTING out of this?! (Which is to say I would be confused, and then I would close the page, cuz… WUT.)
Thanks, Lampdevil!
Interesting questions, and responses. Here are mine:
1. Say thank you. I’ve just about gotten to the stage where I can accept a compliment, after assuming for years that people were politely lying to me. (If they’re male and they carry on the conversation in a certain direction, though, see #3.)
2. Go ‘nyeeah, right’ and go do something else. Or make some witty retort about their manners/maturity/willy size, depending on how brave I felt.
3. Block them from my Facebook. This has actually happened a couple of times; I’ve had male strangers ‘compliment’ me and imply we could have ‘good times together’…when my profile quite clearly and correctly says I’m married. No, thanks, guys.
4. Depends on context. If it were someone I knew, I’d be OK with it but still prefer they’d asked me first. If they didn’t know me, I’d be wary, and if it were one of those ‘hey, look at the gross fatty’ sites I’d contact them and ask to have it removed. (Assuming this even works. Anyone had to try that?)
5. Take legal action – again, assuming that’s possible.
Thanks, Emerald!
This is a fun post. Here’s my response:
1. Someone compliments you on your beauty.
I’ll say thank you, and think what good taste they have.
2. Someone says you are unattractive.
I’ll say “you need to look at your own reflection you mirror cracker” and think about whacking them on the head with my big purse.
3. Someone says your are sexy.
Once again, a heart felt thank you and hope that this hypothetical turns real.
4. Someone copies/reblogs your photo.
That will never happen as I have never been photographed. I’m allergic to the camera. If they want to re-blog my black and white gravatar have at it.
5. Your photo appears on a porn site (even though there’s nothing pornographic about the photo).
I hope the sexiness of my gravatar turns somebody on.
Thanks, La femme!